Often the instruments of change
Are not kind or just
And the hardest openness
Of all might be
To embrace the change
While not wasting your heart
Fighting the instrument.
~ Mark Nepo, Fighting the Instrument
I was raised with the idea that God is sacred. The Christian Bible is sacred. Life in the womb was even (on some occasions) labeled “sacred”, although that was more in the late ’70s to early ’80s – not in my younger years. What I learned went something like this…
God? Sacred (period)
People? Sinners… unworthy… Not sacred.
Animals? Not capable of conscious thought and less than human… Not sacred.
Plants, Rocks, nature in general – No thought, no soul, created solely for animal benefit, and therefore, less than humans or animals… Not sacred.
This never sat quite right with me… Early on, I began to believe that all things are sacred… Not trying to be religious or controversial… So, please don’t tune me out… Stay with me for a bit more, please.
First, I know that not all of us in this space share the same faith or ideas of God, the Universe, or whatever Divinity or Non-divinity ideations that exist. That is fine. This idea, today, though hinges on two thoughts for me… Maybe one (or both) will be something you can relate to, as well.
First thought… If the Divine/Universe/(Insert your own view here) created all things, then all things are Divine – no mistakes. All things are as they are meant to be, and no one thing is more sacred than another… Instead, all things are sacred. All things are to be cared for and treated with awe and respect.
We can look at the world around us and choose to see the blessings and abundance that surround us – day in and day out… The beauty in a flower opening in spring and the exhilaration of walking through a path of crunchy fall leaves… The endearing scent of a newborn baby and the stories and memories of a beloved senior… The unfiltered exuberance of a puppy and the majesty of a soaring eagle… All of these things inspire awe in me. All of these things deserve sacred respect from me.
But, there is something more. This is the second part… It isn’t just the things that we can experience through our five senses that are sacred…
Anyone who has experienced the loss of someone they loved dearly has also learned that there are other precious things also surrounding us which cannot be touched, seen, heard, tasted, or smelled. Through our loss and grief, we learned fairly quickly just how precious life and time truly are. Neither can be replicated or recreated… Once they are gone, they are gone… for good.
We can’t get time back, and we can’t get our loved ones back. Yet, moving forward in life can often feel impossible. There are days when all I can think about is how I wish Bruce were still here… But he isn’t… And while it is important for our healing for us to stand in that pain and work through it, staying there for too long stops us from experiencing and appreciating the sacredness of our own lives… right here… right now.
It isn’t easy. I know that… I have no intention of trying to sound like it is. I am writing this as much as a reminder for myself as for anyone else on this path. I know exactly how precious life is. I also know that the time I have with my other loved ones is precious, as well. Still, I’ll admit it – I’m not full-on loving this life every single moment. (Who is?)
What I am saying is that I want to remember just how precious and sacred are this life and this time that I have been gifted here… Then, I want to stand in my circumstances (whatever they are) and still live my life in such a way that others will know it, too.
“Longing for the past and its seeming perfection
destroys our ability to create the potential sacredness of today.”
~ Jamie Sams, Earth Medicine
NOTE: If you were looking for me last weekend, I was traveling with one of Bruce’s sisters – spending precious time with a precious sister. I thank you for your understanding. 😊
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Grief is a daily challenge. It changes us in ways we could never foresee, making this journey a difficult path for anyone. That is why I share the mistakes I have made, as well as what I have felt and learned along the way. Even sharing our stories of love and life can be helpful on this journey. We know learning to function on this new path is hard, and it is easy to lose our way or forget that we don’t have to do it alone.
I don’t think any of us chose to be here… I know I didn’t. Yet, this is where life has landed us for now… This is where we are. Our lives are now filled with challenges we never imagined and emotions that feel overwhelming at times. So often, I think I have it all figured out, only to find that isn’t true at all. Despite the years since Bruce passed, my life is still filled with challenges, as I am sure yours is too. Learning to take it one day/moment at a time is all any of us can do.
Thankfully, I know I am not alone… None of us are… We have each other. It is our love for those we have lost that brings us together into this space where we can share our experiences. I believe the sharing of our stories is so important… I believe it is healing. Do you have a story to tell? I believe we can find courage and strength in one another’s stories. I believe we can offer each other empathy when we open our hearts to one another. I don’t know about you, but it makes me feel better knowing there are others out there who understand what I mean, and what I feel. It’s nice to know I’m not alone.
Maybe this strikes a chord with you too. We would all love to hear your thoughts or your story. If you would like to share your experience or if you need a helping hand or maybe a virtual hug, let us know. We are here for you… This is our community. To share your thoughts and experiences go to the comments and leave your message.*
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