“Thank you for being the reason I smile!” ~ 365 Relationship Quotes About Happiness to Live By
During the short time Bruce and I were together, I can remember writing thank you notes to his parents for the gift of this wonderful man they had raised. Even from the beginning, I knew I wanted to thank them… They needed to know that because of their parenting, this wonderful man had blessed my life. On a constant basis throughout our marriage, Bruce and I also never missed an opportunity to thank each other for all the ways we felt blessed because of what the other person added to our life. In all honesty, I believe this simple act had the biggest impact on our more-than-successful marriage than anything else.
There is nothing quite like being appreciative and feeling appreciated to build a strong relationship… which has led me to write the following in my journal this week…
Hi Babe!
I know there are so many times, I start writing with “I miss you so much.” However, today I just wanted to say, “Thank you.”
From the moment you first said, “Hello” to our last kiss goodnight, I never doubted your love… Quite an accomplishment given the situation I came from before I knew you. Yet, because of you, I learned what love really is and how to trust again.
You had the simplest ways of showing me that love…
I will always remember the time when we were first married… I had poured you a beer and when I handed it to you, it slipped to the floor, leaving glass and beer everywhere. It was a huge mess, and my instant response was pure fear!
Based on the experiences in my first marriage, I ran to the bathroom and locked myself in… So scared of the consequences I thought would come. I sat in silence waiting for you to come bang on the door and yell at me for making such a mess. That was what I had learned before you… But that never happened. Instead, I could hear you, through the door, cleaning up the mess.
Then, quietly you came and knocked ever so gently on the door. I can’t remember the exact words you said, but hesitantly, I opened the door. Gently, you reached out, took me in your arms and just held me… And I sobbed.
Once I had calmed down, we went back into the freshly cleaned kitchen where you proceeded to pour yourself another beer. I will never forget the next thing you did… You looked me in the eye, held up the glass as if to take a drink, and simply let it go… In disbelief, I watched it crash to the floor creating another new mess. Then, you took me back in your arms and said, “Life is messy sometimes. That’s okay… We can handle that… Nothing will ever make me stop loving you.”
That was my first real memory of the unconditional love that came to envelop my world with you. In that moment, I began to understand and experience true unconditional love… A love that changed my whole world.
But my appreciation doesn’t end there. You also taught me to be a better me… Not through nagging or criticism or anything remotely close to that. You never made me feel like you wanted me to be anything different than what I was in that moment. No… It was your quiet confidence in me that encouraged me.
I learned to take chances… I learn it was okay to fail… and try again. Through it all, you just smiled and encouraged me to try again or to try the next thing. You never told me what to do or not do… You simple smiled, asked me what I wanted to do, and loved me no matter what.
At first, when you died, I was lost. I didn’t think I could do anything else without you there… I missed your encouragement and your confidence. I’m even ashamed to admit it, but in a lot of ways, I lost a lot of the ground I had gained in my own growth. However, once I finally got my feet back under myself, that started to change.
There have been a few rough starts, but rather than letting that appreciation and love fade into the background, I have once again learned to use it to become a stronger person… A better version of me…
I can’t begin to tell you how many times when I am scared to try something new – something way outside my comfort zone – I think about you… And I know… In my mind, I can see you smile with those gentle, loving eyes… In my heart, I can hear your voice telling me you believe in me… I just need to believe in myself. It is almost like you are still here by my side as I gather my courage and push forward.
Thank you for that, Babe! Thank you for building a legacy so strong and so filled with love that even death can’t stop it. Even now, you still amaze me… The way you chose to live your life and love the people around you, still influences me six years later. That is amazing… You are amazing…
I love you, Babe… Always and forever!
“But there’s another kind of love. One that gives you the courage to be better than you are, one that makes you feel that anything is possible.” ~ Michael Bliss, Nights in Rodanthe
What about you? Does the love you shared still influence how you live your life now? If you could thank your loved one for how they changed and added to your life, what would you say? Do you struggle with how to hold onto that? If so, you’re not alone… We all know this journey is hard, but it is even harder to bear alone. I believe we are in this together. None of us are alone, because we have each other. Please feel free to reach out and share your story or thoughts. To do so, go to the comments and leave a note. *
Who knows? Your story may the answer for someone else.
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